A Path Called Me

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  • And just like that, one day I simply understood.

    Everything I had been through suddenly made sense — all the pain, all the hardship, all the tears. It was my soul trying to teach me how to love myself. Every trigger, every painful emotion was there for me to learn from, to remember that I didn’t have to search for love —I needed to learn how to receive and ask for love. And most importantly, how to become love itself.

    Giving was always easy for me, but I never knew how to receive it. And by only giving and not being able to take, my whole being was growing weaker. I’ve changed so much because of how my life has unfolded and because of the people who have crossed my path along the way. Now, all of it makes beautiful sense.

    There was a time when I closed my heart so tightly that my soul didn’t want to stay in this body anymore — I almost died. There wasn’t enough love left for me or for life itself. But I prayed. I said to God: If there is still something for me here to do or learn, then I will gladly stay. More than anything, I wanted to be a witness to my daughter growing up, to see her become a mother, and to experience all that life would bring.

    I wanted to stay with all my heart, not realizing then that my heart was closed and filled with coldness. Now I understand that what happened was a kind of wake-up call — a reminder that I am still a kind and loving person, that I still carry deep understanding and compassion for other people’s hardships.

    I don’t know what life will bring me, but I do know that whatever happens, I will face it with an open heart, trusting that I am always protected. Because living from the heart is so much more fulfilling than trying to control or predict everything. The truth is, the most beautiful and meaningful things in my life have come out of nowhere — unexpected gifts from God.

    We think we know what we want, but do we really? I thought I did, but now I see that I didn’t. What I know now is that, no matter what is happening in the world, I choose to live my life with an open heart — because that is who we truly are.
    We are Love in its most magnificent form.

  • Joy

    I used to think that I needed to be happy to feel joy. It seemed impossible to be joyful when I thought I wasn’t happy. But I realized that’s not true.

    A while ago, I was in the hospital, very sick. Even though I didn’t feel happy, there were so many moments when I felt joy. I came to understand that joy and happiness are not the same—joy lives deeper, beyond moods or circumstances.

    It seems like everyone is searching for happiness—I was one of those people. But I’m not anymore. Because one day I’m happy, and another day I’m sad or exhausted, yet even on those days, I can always find something that gives me joy.

    When I’m sad, my daughter has a gift for making me laugh—and in that moment, I feel joy. When I’m exhausted, I feel joy when I lie down in bed and my body can finally relax. That’s an amazing revelation.

    Every day, even on the worst day, there’s always a small moment of joy. I collect those moments now, and every night before I go to sleep, I think about them. And that makes me feel happy.

    So I guess we can be happy or unhappy—it’s just a choice and a matter of recognizing what’s in front of us at the moment. I used to live without knowing that it’s okay to laugh even in the most critical situations. We came into this world to live joyfully and to experience life.

    There’s no one in this world without a wound or a scar. But that doesn’t mean life is only bad. It just means we’re human. Those hurtful events make us stronger and wiser, helping us make better decisions in the future.

    The truth is, somehow we remember the good times and joyful moments—at least I do. When I look back on my past, I see good and joyful memories. There’s no reason to dwell on what wasn’t good.

    I surround myself with happy pictures and positive people, and there’s so much joy in my life now. If I find myself slipping into negativity, I know it’s my job to change that. It’s not about what other people do or what’s happening in the world—it’s about me, my thoughts, and my choice to seek, find, and see joy and miracles everywhere I look.

  • Words

    A little while ago, I thought I had so much to say, but no one to listen. So, I found another way to let it all out and express my thoughts. I started journaling, and after that, I began to write a blog. And then, words started to flow.

    It’s such a powerful thing — to express yourself through words. Words are very powerful. Not only the ones we speak, but also the ones we think and the ones we write. They help us express our feelings, name our experiences, and connect with others.

    But words can also hurt and break. Too often, we use them to make someone smaller, to punish, or to wound. Yet, with words, we can also express love. We can admire, comfort, and tell beautiful stories.

    We live in a world that is constantly changing. That can feel scary — not knowing what will happen to us or to the people we love. But I also see beautiful change happening. I see people who no longer accept only bad news and fearful messages from the media. I see awakened souls who speak about love, who use their words to show beauty and peace. Even when they disagree or don’t like someone, they choose kind words.

    I hear beautiful words everywhere. I read words filled with love, peace, appreciation, and joy — and because of that, I feel like I’m living in a wonderful world.

    Words flow constantly in our minds — they rest only when we sleep. So often, we call ourselves or others names like “stupid,” “lazy,” or “jealous.” But wouldn’t it be better to say beautiful things instead? Start with yourself: call yourself smart, beautiful, kind, sexy — whatever feels good. Even if you don’t believe it at first, if you keep doing it every day, it will become natural.

    Then, start saying nice things to others too. It costs nothing to compliment someone, and for them, it might be something they remember for the rest of their life. Isn’t that wonderful?

    I choose to live in a world filled with beautiful words. And because of that, I see beauty everywhere — exactly as it is. Life is wonderful. The world is beautiful. You just have to want to see it that way.

    Love brings joy, while fear brings pain..
    So be love. Show love. Express love. Use loving words when you speak. And when you feel something different — anger, fear, frustration — write it down on paper or in your phone, let it stay there, release it — punch a pillow, throw rocks into the river.

    But when you speak — spread love. Use your words with kindness.
    Because words are powerful, and that means we are powerful.

    Let’s use our power to spread love all around.

  • Solitude

    It’s not easy to understand solitude and silence when life is full of people, responsibilities, and noise. We work, we care for loved ones, we stay busy with things we think we love. And yet—whether we realize it or not—we long for quiet. Our soul longs for it. The question is: do we listen?

    I thought I was listening. But it turned out, not completely. It wasn’t until I was really alone that I understood what solitude felt like. I felt so lonely, so left out. I kept wondering: Why is this happening? Why is nobody here when I need a conversation, or simply a meal together? God, it was hard.The more I resisted that emptiness, the sadder I became.

    One day, in a moment of surrender, I asked myself: It’s just me, myself, and I—so what are you going to do about it?

    Slowly, things shifted. I started to enjoy walking alone in the park, savoring every step. I went to the beach and felt it in every sense—the sound of waves, the salt in the air, the peace of simply being there. That quiet became something I couldn’t explain in words. And in that space, my soul began to speak louder. Or maybe I simply began listening more closely. Either way—I heard.

    Memories and passions resurfaced. Promises I had once made to myself. Dreams I had quietly tucked away under the weight of expectations. All of it waiting—just waiting—for me to notice again. We spend so much of life becoming who we think we should be, while the parts of us that bring real joy gather dust. They never disappear. They wait patiently for our attention, because they know the joy they’ll bring when we finally return to them.

    Life moves at such a pace that we often lose sight of ourselves. Even with countless tools and machines meant to save us time, our lists only grow longer.

    But when a moment of silence comes, don’t be upset by it. Don’t rush to fill it. Instead, turn off the noise—your phone, the television, the constant distractions. Go within. That’s where the treasures are—waiting to be discovered again.

    What may at first feel like loneliness is not isolation. It is an invitation. An opening. It comes for a reason. Because you are worthy of living with ease, joy, and alignment. When you follow that inner voice, life unfolds more beautifully than you ever imagined.

    Yes, sometimes life feels like punishment. But it never truly is. Every experience can be turned into something meaningful—if you’re willing. So be brave. Step back if you need to. Even hide for a while. Because in that quiet, you’ll be surprised at what begins to reveal itself.

  • Purpose

    There was a time not long ago when I became somewhat obsessed with finding my purpose in life. So, I began my search. First, I asked myself: What is my purpose as a human being? I thought about my job and the university I chose. I believed that if I kept learning, I could become more useful to others.

    Then I asked myself: What is my purpose as a woman? I reflected on my roles—as a mother, a wife, a friend, a daughter. But eventually, I felt that there had to be more to life than just the roles I play. I started thinking that maybe I should do something big, something that would help a large number of people.

    Then one day, I made a simple decision: I would live the best life I possibly could, every single day. And that became my purpose.

    Each morning, I wake up and live the day as if it were my last on this planet. I stay true to myself, aligned with my values. Every day, I try to be kinder than I was yesterday, more understanding, more loving.

    Purpose doesn’t have to be tied to big dreams—you can find it in the small, everyday moments. When I drink my coffee, I feel grateful that I can taste and smell its rich aroma. When I wash the dishes, I marvel at how water flows from the faucet. When I see the ocean, I’m filled with wonder at its depth and vastness. When I laugh with my daughter until we can’t breathe and our bellies ache, I feel alive.

    Sharing a smile with a stranger, giving someone a compliment—these moments may seem small, but they are full of meaning. That, to me, is the purpose of living: to be fully present in each moment, and to see those moments as miracles.

    If everyone could truly see and hear what is happening around them, I believe we could all say we are living a purposeful life.

  • A Love Letter

    Dear Love,

    Where are you?

    I used to wonder that so often.
    Are you in my mother’s warm embrace?
    In the neighbor’s kind “Good morning”?
    Are you hidden in the soft light of a new day, or in the joyful smile of my daughter?


    Does the green grass carry you?

    Or perhaps you’re in the face of a stranger I passed in the park? 

    I searched for you everywhere.
    So many of us do—looking for love in people, in places, in fleeting moments.

    For me, life has always been about you.
    Because life without love? It felt like it lacked meaning.

    I searched for you in people first.
    And I did find you—within my family, my friends, and in the most beautiful form of all: the love I feel for my daughter.

    Then, I found you in places.
    In the lake where I grew up.
    In the city where I studied.
    In the place I now call home.

    And then, I began to find you in nature.

    In the rhythm of ocean waves.

    In the majesty of the mountains.

    In poppy-filled meadows.

    In the pear tree in my grandparents’ yard.

    I discovered you in the little things, too:
    In the taste of my mom’s brownies.

    In a squirrel’s darting across the park.

    And in countless other tiny, beautiful moments.

    But even though I saw you everywhere, something still felt incomplete.
    There was always a small ache. A sense that something essential was missing.

    Until one day, I looked into the mirror—into my own eyes—and finally saw what I’d been overlooking all along.

    You were there.
    You had been waiting.

    I had never thought to look for love within myself.
    Never paused to offer love to myself.

    And that changed everything.
    Because the most valuable love, the most healing, the most lasting—was the one I gave to me.

    So now I know:
    You are not just out there, scattered in the world.
    You are also right here, inside me.
    Always have been.
    Always will be.

    With all my heart,
    Me

  • Pain

    Pain accompanies our life from day one. We are born and we cry—I would call that emotional pain, confusion pain. We don’t know what’s going on. It seems like everyone is afraid to feel pain. Physical or emotional.

    We avoid emotional pain and end up hurting ourselves physically so that our attention shifts. Because it’s easier to deal with physical pain than emotional pain. So we drink too much, we eat too much, we take drugs, we blame others for our misery. We punch things until there’s blood on our fists. We exercise until our body gives out. We work too much, we study too much.

    Honestly, I could go on and on with ways people hurt themselves. By doing this, we are trying to escape. We’re scared to face what really hurts. And there’s a lot to face, if I’m being honest. Not everyone will do that— not in their entire life.

    Why? Because we would have to confront the truth. The truth about what happened—the things we’d rather forget. The truth about what we did. Our mistakes. The people we hurt. The lies we told. The truths we’re ashamed to admit.

    That’s a lot of responsibility. And who wants that? Who consciously chooses pain in a world where pleasure and happiness are advertised everywhere you look?

    It’s easier to have fun. It’s easier to keep ourselves busy. It’s easier to talk about others. It’s easier to see everything else—just not the pain inside.

    Some people do this their whole life. Some find the courage to look inside. And yes, it hurts. It hurts so much I can’t even describe it. A drilling tooth or broken bone is nothing compared to this pain.

    But when you start healing small pieces of your soul—of your being—it slowly dissolves. It gets better.

    I’ve faced a lot of my pain. Crawling in it. Crying for hours. Begging, “When will this end?” And I still experience it from time to time, because we can’t heal all at once. Some wounds are deeper, and we have to be ready to feel them.

    The good part? God will never give us more than we can handle. So when something comes up and the pain rises again, deep down I know—it’s time.

    That doesn’t mean I’m not angry. I am. And I ask God: Why? Every time I go through it, I have a conversation with God. I say everything—how angry I am, how unfair life feels, how He can allow this, how I’m supposed to live with all these truths I now see. I speak without a filter.

    And then, I say thank you. Because I know this pain gives me freedom. It gives me a beautiful understanding of my being, of my life. And then—I see more. I feel more.

    Because when pain leaves, it makes space for love, joy, happiness—and most importantly—gratitude.
    Gratitude that I’m here. That I can experience life on this planet. That God made me so perfectly imperfect.

    We’re taught to search for the good, for happy moments. But life is not only about joy. It’s both.
    Good and bad.
    Happy and sad.
    Success and failure.

    And in both, we find depth. We find meaning. We find ourselves.

  • Emotions

    Emotions are our internal compass. They let us know that something important is happening within us—a sign that deserves attention. We feel anger when things don’t go as planned. We feel joy when we’re with someone we love. These feelings are part of what makes us human.

    When I was a child, I often heard, “Stop crying,” when I was sad, or “Don’t be so angry,” when I was upset. Even when I was laughing with joy, I was told to quiet down. Over time, I learned not to feel—or at least, not to show it. I buried my emotions, hiding parts of myself to avoid judgment.

    Later in life, my relationships reflected those early lessons. I found myself in situations where I was told that my feelings were “too much” or “not real.” I was manipulated into believing my emotions were wrong, that my instincts couldn’t be trusted. I began judging myself more harshly than anyone else ever could. I thought I was a failure, that I didn’t know how to live. So, I became a perfectionist—on the outside, strong and confident; on the inside, lost and afraid.

    I didn’t trust myself, because I had been taught not to. I let others tell me who I should be—how to raise my child, what career to pursue, even what to eat. Looking back, it feels like I was living someone else’s life. And in truth, I was.

    But things began to change when I started to reconnect with my emotions—all of them. I began to allow myself to feel anger, frustration, sadness, joy, and happiness. Even when a voice inside tried to shut it down—“Why are you happy when your life is such a mess?”—I kept going.

    Now, I feel everything. Sometimes I understand why, and sometimes I don’t. And honestly, I’ve made peace with not always knowing. The meaning comes eventually. I’ve learned to let my emotions exist without judgment, and I’m learning how to manage them—especially when they show up at unexpected times.

    From everything I’ve had to learn to make my life better, this has been the hardest. But also the most powerful. It’s a lifelong practice—just like taking care of my body with workouts. Some days are strong, some are slow, but all of them are worth the effort. Especially when it comes to things—and people—we care about.

    My wish for myself is to become a master of emotional resilience. But even if I don’t reach that goal completely, I will still celebrate how far I’ve come. Because this work—this healing—is already changing my life.

  • Honesty

    I want to start with one word: wow. Because I genuinely can’t believe what I heard earlier today. I was told that my honesty would get me into real trouble—that by being honest, I wouldn’t be respected by others. Wow.

    And you know what? I kind of agree. Unfortunately, most people don’t really want to hear the truth. They want to hear what makes them feel good—what they want to hear. I’ll admit it: I used to do that. I was a people-pleaser. I said things just to avoid hurting anyone, even when deep down I felt something completely different.

    I let others speak their minds about me, while I tiptoed around my own thoughts, being careful not to say too much. Not anymore. I’m done apologizing for being honest.

    If you don’t like what I say, that’s okay. I respect your reaction. I won’t argue—because I’m not you, and I don’t know what’s going on inside of you. What I share is just my opinion, and everyone is entitled to their own.

    I’ve come to realize two important things: first, everyone wants to be heard. And second, everyone wants to believe that what they’re doing is right. And that’s okay. We should all live our lives the way we choose—not the way others expect us to. We should have our own opinions.

    What I truly wish for in this world is more respect—respect for others, for differences, for uniqueness. There’s not a single person on this planet who is exactly like someone else. So, as many people as there are, there are that many perspectives. And that’s a beautiful thing. It’s what makes us all special and unique.

    Wouldn’t it be nice to have a conversation where I can share my opinion, and you can share yours—without anyone getting upset, without anyone feeling disrespected, without the need to prove who’s right?

    I started with myself. I began to respect myself—even when no one clapped for my choices. And with that, respect for others naturally followed. I wish everyone could feel that kind of freedom—the kind that comes when you stop caring about what others say about your opinions or your life choices. It’s incredibly liberating.

    I’m grateful that I have a few people in my life with whom I can truly be myself—people I can be honest with. As for those who felt disrespected by my honesty—they’re simply no longer in my life.

    I believe it takes courage to be honest and open. It’s scary at first. But once you experience the incredible feeling of being truthful with yourself, you’ll never want to go back to pleasing people with lies.

  • Trust

    Who—and what—do we trust?

    I used to believe people wouldn’t hurt me. I believed their words. I trusted their actions. I thought if I was kind, honest, and open-hearted, the world would meet me with the same. But life doesn’t always work like that.

    We’re born open. Curious. Trusting. Then life happens. People hurt us—sometimes by accident, sometimes through carelessness—and that trust begins to crack.

    As kids, we trust blindly. We follow the lead of adults and older friends, assuming they know better. But at some point, we get hurt. We feel let down, betrayed. And we begin to question not just others, but ourselves.

    That happened to me. I started questioning my worth. Wondering what I’d done wrong. And eventually, I found myself questioning everything. Was this what life was supposed to be? A constant fight to feel safe, seen, and whole?

    I knew I didn’t want to live like that anymore.

    When you finally start asking deeper questions, the answers come. Not always gently. Sometimes through pain. But they come. And for me, the truth was this: I am responsible for my life.

    That truth changed everything. It gave me a new beginning—a second chance.

    I began learning how to trust myself.

    Yes, I’ve made mistakes. I’ve let myself down. Chosen comfort over truth. Chosen people over peace. But I kept watching. I kept asking:

    Was that decision rooted in self-respect—or fear?
    Was I being true to myself—or just trying to be accepted?
    Was it love—or my ego?

    Over time, choice by choice, I started building a life that felt real. Not perfect. Not always easy. But real.

    It was hard at first.
    Hard to say no.
    Hard to speak up.
    Hard to set boundaries.
    Hard to choose myself.

    But I did. And it got easier.

    Now, I listen to myself. I speak honestly. I protect my energy. And yes—some people didn’t like that. Some drifted away.

    And that’s okay.

    Because the more I honored myself, the more I rebuilt trust—not in others, not in the world, but in me.

    That’s how trust was reborn.

    I lost faith in people. At times, I even lost faith in God. But I’ve come to understand: everything begins within.

    If I want to trust the world, I have to trust myself first.
    If I want to believe in goodness, I have to live it.
    And if I want to feel safe, I have to choose what’s right for me—even when it’s hard.

    That’s where trust starts.
    That’s how love grows.
    That’s how I came home to myself.